Celebrity Silliness

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Colin Farrell Is Kind of Gross

Colin Farrell is a big fan of Russell Crowe. He had this to say about the other actor: "I really enjoyed watching 'Gladiator'. But I really think that Russell Crowe could get up, pull his pants down, take a s**t, and you would still be completely blown away by it."

This may be nothing, but I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest that this comment makes Farrell sound like the kind of guy who would lock himself in his room for hours so that he could "read" Cat Fancy in peace.

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Scarlett Johansson Critical of Bush

Scarlett Johannson, the actress whose name is the enemy of spellcheckers everywhere, recently spoke out against President Bush. The actress had this to say, "We're supposed to be liberated in America but if our president had his way, we wouldn't be educated about sex at all. Every woman would have six children and we wouldn't be able to have abortions."

Huh. And all this time I didn't know that Scarlett had an M.A. in political science. I mean, she must, right, if anybody listens to her politics?

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Tom Cruise Promotes Heftiness

Tom Cruise was in for a big surprise when he tried on his custom made tuxedo the other day only to find out that it no longer fit him. Apparently, since he stopped his strict exercise regime that he had been on so that he could look his best for MI3, the actor has put on 14 pounds.

Katie, I implore you, especially if you have a thing for somewhat heftier guys, give me a call, before it's too late!

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Michael Jackson No "Thriller" at World Music Awards

Michael Jackson made a less than stellar return to the stage at the World Music Awards, it has been reported. The singer had been expected to sing his hit "Thriller," but when he instead sang part of the chorus of "We Are the World," the crowd starting booing the reclusive pop star.

I would make fun, but, I mean, if you don't sing in front of people for ten years, and then expect to just go out there and do it, it stands to reason that you're going to have some problems.

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Recent Links:
Paris Hilton Won't Stay at the Family's Hotel
Michael Jackson to Perform in London

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Shakira Loves Her Home Country

Shakira was honored by her hometown of Barranquilla, Colombia today with the unveiling of a 6 ton statue of the singer. The singer was visibly moved, and she had this to say about the experience: "Barranquilla is the big breast that fed and nurtured me as a human being, a woman and an artist."

Hmm. Apparently calling your home town a "big breast" is appropriate when you're from a Spanish speaking country. I'll keep that in mind.

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Recent Links:
Katie Holmes Big on Underwear
Ashley Judd Takes a Shot at Men's Magazines
Lindsay Lohan Tired of Party Girl Image

George Clooney Is Handsome

George Clooney has been named People Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive. When asked about how he felt about the honor, Clooney responded "This one's going to be hard for Brad (Pitt) since he's been Sexiest Man Alive twice ... I'd say 'Sexiest Man Alive' to him and he'd go, 'Two-time.' So that's been taken away ... So Brad's going to be upset."

I'm sure Brad Pitt will cry all the way to his beautiful girlfriend.

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Things That Make You Go "Ew."

Elton John said recently that, though he lost his virginity at the age of 23, he wishes that he would have lost it at 14 "because that's such an exciting age to have sex."

I guess I wouldn't be so creeped out by this statement if I were alive when Elton was a sex symbol. As it is, I'm not sure that this is the kind of thing I want to hear from somebody who writes Disney musicals.

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Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Nicole Kidman May Be Pregnant

It is being reported that Nicole Kidman, in a recent visit to her husband Keith Urban in California where he is in rehab, told her husband that she was expecting. Keith was reportedly happy at the news, but sad due to the fact that it's a bad time for him because he's in rehab.

It's all right, Keith. You'll get your act squared away, and then you'll be a good father. Congratulations to the couple.

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Paris Hilton Won't Stay at the Family's Hotel

During a recent trip to London, Paris Hilton had planned to stay at the Hilton hotel on Park Lane. However, after spending only one night there, the socialite snuck over to Covent Garden's St Martin's Lane Hotel, where she spent the rest of her trip.

I guess when you're rich, you don't care about being able to stay places for free. I know that I would certainly rather not pay for staying somewhere, but I guess that's why I'm not Paris Hilton; well, that and the Y chromosome.

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Katie Holmes Big on Underwear

Katie Holmes went shopping the other day, and has reportedly spent over $3000 dollars on underwear for her wedding night. This includes, but is not limited to, a $440 bra, a $340 thong, and a $220 garter belt.

First, how can anybody spend three hundred and forty bucks on a thong? There's hardly anything there! Is it made out of gold? If so, isn't it horribly uncomfortable?

Second, I guess that this just goes to show that Katie really believes that it's not what's on the outside, but what's underneath that counts.

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Kate Winslet Has Baby Fever

In a recent interview, Kate Winslet revealed that she would love to have more children. The mother of a 6 year old and a 3 year old already, Winslet said, "I'm hoping to have more kids. I don't [care] whether one or two. Oh, God, I would love to have more."

Well, with her being that straightforward about it, I wonder if she is taking nominations for father? If so, I have a recommendation.

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Angelina Doesn't Understand Madonna's Deal

Due to Madonna's recent comments to the media about how she's "not interested in going in there like an idiot and going, 'OK, I'm going to build ten orphanages and I'll see you guys later,'" which was taken by many to be a critique of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's humanitarian work, Angelina Jolie is reportedly, obviously, shocked. The actress doesn't understand why somebody in Madonna's position would talk to the media in anything other than a positive way.

Huh. Madonna's trying to steal a kid from Africa, and she's throwing stones at Brad and Angelina. Looks like somebody woke up on the cranky side of the bed.

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Monday, November 13, 2006

Pam Dislikes Hairy Backs

Pamela Anderson recently stuck up for costar Denise Richards in her recent reaction to the press. She was quoted as saying that she "Can't believe [the] set is surrounded by loser paparazzi – not Canadian – all American and European...Leave us alone!!! They are being super idiots!!! Yelling rude stuff. They need to really go home! What is the big deal? All these big hairy men attacking us girls. A-holes!!!"

Well, so, Denise Richards has Pamela Anderson's vote of support. If that doesn't fill your heart with cheer, I don't know what will.

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