Celebrity Silliness: 2007

Monday, December 10, 2007

Hello Scarlett!

In a recent interview, Dolly Parton said that in a movie of her life, she would love to be played by Scarlett Johansson.

And, in a different way, so would I, though she doesn't necessarily need to play me per se. We could have a real and fulfilling relationship, and then end it on good terms.

Yeah, probably not, but I can always dream right?

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Keira Knightley, All Nude, All the Time

In a recent interview on the Ellen Degeneres show, Keira came clean about, well, coming clean. "I don't know why it happened this way. People ask me to pose naked and I just say yes! I find it vaguely liberating. I hope I don't become a nudist, but I'm definitely on my way!"

And, in this way, Keira become one of Ellen's very favorite guests.

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Thursday, April 12, 2007

Author Kurt Vonnegut Dies

Brilliant and thought-provoking author Kurt Vonnegut passed away last night at the age of 84. This great man penned the fascinating novels Slaughterhouse Five and Cat's Cradle among many others.

Oddly enough, his death kind of goes right along with one of his basic philosophies of life and existence: so it goes.

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Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Jennifer Hudson Gets Free Food

It has been reported that due to an incident on American Idol where she, in response to a stinging barb by Simon who said that she wasn't thankful enough, asked if she also needed to thank Burger King for giving her her first job, Jennifer Hudson has been given free Burger King food for life. Burger King said that its loss of an employee was the entertainment world's gain.

Uhm, I'm going to go out on a limb here and suggest that Jennifer already has quite enough junk in the trunk, and she is beautiful the way she is. Let's hope that she doesn't take the king up on this offer too often. On the other hand, let's also hope that she doesn't turn into a skeleton like old Lindsay.

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Monday, March 12, 2007

Now I Can Rest Easily, and Sleep Again

It is being reported that Mel B (the one making the un-pleasant face to the left) has decided to come off of her high horse and join the group again so that they can have a six-month world tour.

Seeing as how the Spice Girls are my whole reason for living, I couldn't be happier. I can once again breathe.

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Michael Jackson to Sell Beatles Catalogue

Due to some enormous debts, Michael Jackson has decided to sell the remainder of the Beatles catalogue that he bought 22 years ago. Due to this purchase, Michael lost the friendship of his one-time musical accomplice, Paul McCartney.

Hmm. I guess it doesn't pay to screw over a friend. That's good to know.

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Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Jim Carrey Says the Words that Every Woman Is Dying to Hear

When recently queried as to whether or not he would give girlfriend Jenny McCarthy a ring to show her that he loves her, Jim Carrey replied, "We're never getting married, but we're never getting divorced, which is fantastic."

Aw. Nothing pulls at the heartstrings more than a man who's with a woman who's much more attractive than he denying her marriage. I know that it makes me go a big rubbery one.

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Tuesday, February 06, 2007

After Denying Herself, Lindsay Treats Herself to Some Comfort, Southern, That Is

It is being reported that after spending a goodly amount of time in rehab over the last few weeks, Lindsay Lohan rewarded her own graduation by going out and clubbing over the weekend.

Because if there's one thing that a recovering alcoholic needs, it's booze.

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Monday, February 05, 2007

Ben Affleck Is Not Smoking

Everyone’s favorite husbandish figure to Jennifer Garner has made news recently by announcing that he will no longer be a smoker. Apparently, the number of cigarettes that he had to smoke on the set of “Smokin’ Aces” eventually came to disgust him.

Well, with him putting out the flames of smoking, I guess the only thing that’s left that’s hot about him is his…uhm…er…

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Celebrity Silliness