Thursday, July 06, 2006

Heather Locklear

I remember when I was a young lad, at the ripe old age of eight or nine, and I heard about and saw this beautiful woman by the name of Heather Locklear. I came to understand that she was an actress of the hit tv show, Melrose Place, and I wished that I could watch that show.

I wished not because my parents wouldn't let me watch it, mind you. I wished I could watch it because the acting was so bad that I wanted to stick my eyeballs in a blender in an effort to atone for the horrible things that I had just forced them to watch.

As we all know, Heather is getting divorced from her husband, Richie Samboa, and she has apparently found a new beau, if you can call David Spade a new beau. She is expressing this by getting the name "Finch" tattooed on her person, which is Spade's name on the tv show, Just Shoot Me.

Just shoot me, indeed.

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